And so the gift wrapping unravels

Reflecting on the year always seems to be such a difficult task. Maybe because my fingers can't keep up with all the thoughts in my head as I try to remember everything that happened throughout the year. Maybe it's just because I've never mastered the skill of condensing all my thoughts into concise written words. Maybe it's because remembering is bittersweet and it just reminds me that another year has passed and I've added more lines on my face and zero inches on my vertical stature. Nevertheless, I will attempt to put it all into words and share it with you - because that's what Christmas is about, right? And I'm all about sharing.



So here goes...



Things I've learned from all our travels this year:

1) San Francisco is ALWAYS cold. Doesn't matter what time of year. Sure it's in California - theoretically, it should be warm. Nope! Plan on packing warm clothes otherwise you end up with miserable, whiny, snot-faced children. I had 4 of them during our trip.


2) Chinatown is the best place to take the kids when they have a $10 daily budget. You can buy a lot of useless doodads in Chinatown for $10! Be prepared for said useless doodads to break by the time you get to your hotel room, though. But hey - you can browse for hours looking at cheap useless doodads.





































3) Never give your children permission to text or call you when you travel internationally without them. Else you end with a significant cell phone bill at the end of the month.

4) Filipinos are everywhere. Case in point: the Grand Cayman island. Any service-oriented job seems to have been filled by a Filipino. It's not surprising then that the world's 7th Billion baby was born in the Philippines.



5) Apparently, the Ritz-Carlton frowns upon bringing your own libations. Seriously! You have to practice stealth when attempting to sneak alcohol into any of their hotel and beaches. Oh, and pouring vodka into water bottles won't work either. Said Filipino service workers are highly efficient and they will dump your vodka-disguised-as-a-water-bottle when they clean your room.



6) There is actually a point when your body says you've consumed too much alcohol and curing a hangover with more alcohol no longer works. Ask John. But this fact did not stop him from trying the aforementioned cure.







7) It takes all of 1 day of being treated like a high-paying guest at the Ritz to feel that you're entitled to it. By the end of the day, I was Posh Spice and deserved to be handed everything. Chartered yachts should be part of my day, dang it! Free massages should be customary - I mean the masseuse gets to touch my awesomeness, that should be gratuity enough, right?












8) Electronic devices are a must when traveling with children. Nooks, iPADs, cell phones, or any other device that keeps opposable thumbs busy if you want whine-free moments. They build hand-to-eye coordination. They make your children seem well-behaved. They allow you to pat yourself on the back because of you've done such a great job of rearing them. See how polite my children are? You only wish your children were that well-behaved! Thank you Steve Jobs for bullying everybody at Apple into understanding that mobile devices should only require thumbs to operate. We are a highly evolved species, after all.




9) The Philippines still has the best islands and beaches. Trust me on this. If you want to go somewhere exotic, consider this piece of information please.


10) Propeller planes are made of tin. You will feel every single movement. Laws of Thermodynamics apply and you will be susceptible to the whole "hot air rises" sensation. And traveling during a Typhoon makes it even more exciting. If you haven't had enough adventure in your life, hop on a propeller plane in the middle of a typhoon. It's guaranteed to make you feel alive.






11) When a guide tells you, "That's an indigenous snake that you probably shouldn't disturb," this is what they really mean: "That's a friggin' poisonous snake so move your as* out of the way!"







12) Children + water sports = FUN. Doesn't matter that the clouds are looming. Doesn't matter that the waves are high and the water's a bit chilly. It's the only time that they can get away with not washing their hands after they pee because they've been swimming in it anyway.


13) 6 year old + Swimming with Fish = PANIC. Doesn't matter that the fish are tiny. "They're fish and I don't know them and mom told me to steer clear of strangers and they're strange fish and they will bite me and then I'm dead." - that's the thought process of a 6 year old and you can't argue against it. Foolproof logic.






14) Children can eat the same meal for 5 straight days and it doesn't get old. Buffet - schmuffet! I want chocolate rice krispies for breakfast, hotdogs for lunch and hotdogs for dinner.




15) Eating a meal with your hands, under a tarp while angry raindrops pound noisily, alongside a community of the down-trodden is quite possibly one of the best meals you'll ever experience. Helping said community with your bare hands is a gift that you will re-open again and again when you're feeling down. It's the present you open when life gets too exhausting and you still have homework, laundry, and real work to do. It's the perfect present to open when you can't wrap your head around your child's illness.




16) Reunions open up old humiliations. Reunions make you vulnerable - you're a 14 year old insecure person again. Reunions remind you what you've been missing all these years and a hug brings it all back in a split-second. Reunions strengthen friendships that you let flounder because you've been busy doing the laundry. Reunions open up your heart.













17) Age definitely matures you. It makes you realize that you can dance like a fool and it won't matter that you did. It makes you accept that all the extra weight you carry means there's just more of you to love. It makes you forgiving and sometimes it even gives you the courage to ask for forgiveness.






18) "When I married Gerlie, I didn't realize I had married a country and it's the best decision I've ever made." is the best love letter my husband has ever written.




WHEW! I wrote a novel, didn't I? Thank you for humoring me and reading this far. So, what else did we do aside from travel?


SOCCER!!!!!! Audrey got upset because Garrett's now in soccer academy. How dare he! She should be the only club soccer player in the family!

All the kids have been taking art classes as evidenced by the pictures below:








Oh, and I've learned that kids learn sarcasm by osmosis. They just suck that attitude right in. I'm raising a bunch of book-reading, art-loving, ball-kicking smart a**es.




John's got an awesome team who make his workdays more rewarding. I've still got the best project, team and bosses - you know you are. Thank you.




The Calagdays and Jeltemas are still blessed with good health.


Life is good.




I know I write for John, Sophie, Audrey and Garrett when I say "Thank you for sharing your lives with us. Have a very happy holiday season!".



Go ahead - unwrap your gifts. I've opened mine already...

Maybe Medusa got sick of men telling her that long hair is sexier

Over 13 years ago, I walked down the aisle and married my husband. While we were dating, I sported hair that went down past my shoulders, about half-way down the curve of my back. I took the time to actually curl my hair every morning. Being of Asian descent, I am blessed with "luscious", heavy, and thick black hair that requires intense heat in order to behave in any semblance of style.

Cut to a few months after the marriage. I had ensnared my man. Time to reduce my daily prep time. So, off went about 4-5 inches of hair. I got myself a "pert" bob. Off went the sex appeal. Hey - I'm off the market, why bother with the work, right?

"FALSE ADVERTISING!" screamed my new husband. Never mind that he has now permanently relegated me to laundry duty when he used to share the job while we were in the getting-to-know-you phase.

My hair never truly went past my shoulders during the years it took to get pregnant with 3 children. As most moms can attest, unless you're willing to permanently pull your hair up in a ponytail, having short hair is in the "Book of Mom" manual. Ponytails bug. They make it easy for somebody to tug at me. They only look good on women that don't have a flat head. Oh, and they prevent you from sitting up straight in your car if you're not at least 5'4". Seriously, car seats were not designed for short people with ponytails. Try it. You can't drive past 5 miles, I guaranty it.




So, dear hubby lived with the wife that now had a bob. In short - I looked like the mom that I am. Granted, I never took to wearing mom jeans. But that's probably because they don't make it in almost- midget sizes.

Kids grow up. Work's ongoing. Soccer becomes part of our lifestyle. Homework is part of our daily rhythm. Dinner consists of anything that can be heated up in 15 minutes. Life gets hectic and I'm lucky if I get 15 minutes uninterrupted time in the bathroom to hide while I read the latest chick lit. Face time with anybody isn't possible. Facebook is my only window to my friends' worlds. Virtual has replaced actual interaction.

Time to visit a salon for a decent haircut ranks about 58 in my list of priorities. Slowly, slowly, slowly the bob has become haircut that my husband once considered "hot". Sure, it's decidedly feminine. But let me tell you, why having long hair is a pain:

1. It takes more time to blow dry your hair. When every single minute counts because you need to be at work exactly at 8:35 am every morning, blow drying hair is a luxury.
2. Brushing your teeth becomes an art form. When you use your hands to cup water to rinse with, you need to always remember to push your hair back, otherwise you've just managed to wet the hair you just finished blow-drying. Buying disposable cups goes against my environmentally friendly, waste reduction conscious bathroom routine. And it takes too much effort to bring bathroom cups downstairs to the dishwasher and replace it with a new one. Seriously - you have to think about this shit.
   
3. You have to spend more money on shampoo AND conditioner because you use so much more of it. DUH!
   
4. There's a lot more hair that you have to clean up off the bathroom floor. When your hair is jet black and your tile floor is beige, piles of hair just look disgusting. It doesn't matter whether or not you're anal retentive. Hair on the floor is just yucky. And walking barefoot on all that hair makes the gross-factor go up even further.
5. Gray hair is all that more obvious. There's nothing worse than being in denial about reaching middle-age and seeing long strands of gray flying by your face when the wind whips your hair about.
   
6. Eating soup is out of the question unless you have a hair clip handy to push the hair back. There's nothing worse that smelling like Korean BBQ all day because your hair's soaked in the delicious smells at the all you can eat buffet you went to for lunch. Sure, the smell's not that unpleasant. But the smell teases you all day. And then you snack on whatever's handy because all you can think of is chomping on that smell.
7. The worse reason of all - you can't wear any sleeveless clothes, especially while sleeping. Have you ever had hair stuck in your armpits? No - I'm not talking about armpit hair that's meant to be stuck in your armpits. I shave that hair, thank you very much. I'm talking about getting hair growing from your scalp. You can't even turn your head because the hair's constricted your movement. Bet you've never even considered this, have you? Well let me tell you. It sucks. Like when you're in the middle of screaming because your daughter just scored a soccer goal and you turn your head and BAM! Whiplash!
   

All I'm saying is -men, next time you tell your lady-friend that she should consider growing her hair long, consider the above. Sure, long hair may be symbolic of a carefree, spirited, young girl. But let me tell you, it comes with a price and you'll be bearing the cost. She'll make you pay in some form or another, just like Medusa did. I'm still making my husband pay. A beer here. A foot massage there. Downstairs speakers. A new IPAD 2. Wait - maybe it is worth it :-)

My >$40K Lemon

On September 2006, John bought a 2004 Lexus GX470 for me from a car dealer in Santa Monica. The car had extremely low miles on it, and it seemed like a good deal at the time.

Because we were buying the car from an independent dealer rather than a Lexus dealer, we took it to Park Place Lexus to check against their certification guidelines. They reported back some minor things that needed to be corrected (the car had been sitting in the lot for a while), but otherwise did not give us any recommendation against a purchase. So we finalized the purchase.

Fast forward to 2008. The car's warranty was up so I wanted to purchase an extended warranty for it. I took the car back to Park Place for an extended warranty inspection. The car passed inspection and Park Place Lexus brokered my purchase of the extended warranty from Zurich Insurance.

The entire time, my vehicle has been serviced only by Park Place Lexus (now called South County Lexus due to an ownership change).

Last month, I brought my car in for it's 55K mile service. Brakes were replaced. Fluids replenished. Service rep called me and said that the right rear axle is bent. "Did I get into any car accidents," he asked. Nope. But I've driven over parking lot curbs. He said that the service would cost around $1400. He recommended going through my car insurance to reduce my cost. So, I did.I picked up my car from Lexus and paid the >$500 it cost to service the vehicle.

Allstate Insurance recommended that I bring my car into Sterling Body Shop. Allstate towed the vehicle, got me a car rental and Sterling called to say, "we can't see anything wrong the car." So, I pointed them over to South County Lexus. Sterling confirmed the issue, ordered the part, fixed the car and then called me to say the car was ready. I came to pick up the car, and Sterling reps said, "Um, listen, we drove the car and it's not drivable. It's not aligned and when we looked into it, we saw that your frame is bent. This car's been in a major accident. Let's walk over to the car and we'll show you what we saw".

Walked over to the car, and saw that 1) the right passenger side has been replaced, the paint color didn't match the rest of the vehicle; 2) the right front wheel is closer to the back wheel frame than the front. Essentially, the car's been in some major damage and somebody had used heat to correct the frame. Car's not driveable - keeps pulling. "What can I do?," I ask. Well, they recommended having an AllState adjuster come take a look at the car to see if the damage can somehow be covered by insurance. Another few more days of waiting...

I got a call - AllState can't do anything because this qualified as prior damage. So, I pay the $400 deductible for the rear axle work, drive my car out of the lot (all the while fighting the pull of the misaligned frame) and then call South County Lexus to say, "Listen, my car was driving fine until I took it in for its regular service. Please fix this."

Brought car back into South County Lexus. Got a loaner vehicle in the meantime. South County Lexus called me to say, we've tweaked it so that the car drives straight. But the car is jacked. If you drive over a pothole, it may become misaligned again. Sick of the drama, I ask about the potential trade-in value of the car. Sales was going to look over the car and call me.

So, today, I finally talked to sales. "Ma'am, we can't buy the car back from you because it's a liability. At this point, we recommend totaling the car." F*****K! This is not a cheap car. It's a friggin' luxury vehicle that drives.

So, why am I writing about this? I need advice. Who can I go after? What's my next move? Ideas? Any lawyers out there that can tell me what the best approach would be at this point?